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Clay Cooper and his band were once the best of the best, the most feared and renowned crew of mercenaries this side of the Heartwyld.

Their glory days long past, the mercs have grown apart and grown old, fat, drunk, or a combination of the three. Then an ex-bandmate turns up at Clay's door with a plea for help--the kind of mission that only the very brave or the very stupid would sign up for.

It's time to get the band back together.

Here there be dragons... and the denizens of Ankh-Morpork wish one huge firebreather would return from whence it came. Long believed extinct, a superb specimen of draco nobilis ("noble dragon" for those who don't understand italics) has appeared in Discworld's greatest city. Not only does this unwelcome visitor have a nasty habit of charbroiling everything in its path, in rather short order it is crowned King (it is a noble dragon, after all...).

From the moment when they first met, in the commission of the same, audacious theft, Fafhrd, the giant barbarian warrior from the Cold Waste, and the Gray Mouser, master thief, novice wizard and expert swordsman, felt no ordinary affinity. Forged over the gleam of sharpened steel as, back to back, they faced their foes, theirs was a friendship that would take them from adventure to misadventure across all of Nehwon, from the caves of the inner earth to the waves of the outer sea. But it was in the dark alleys and noisome back streets of the great fog-shrouded city of Lankhmar that they became legends.

THE FIRST BOOK OF LANKHMAR includes the first four volumes of the hugely enjoyable Swords series.

Interesting Times, the seventeenth novel in Terry Pratchett's Discworld series, finds the planet's oldest empire in the midst of bitter turmoil after the publication of the revolutionary treatise What I Did on My Holidays. Workers, with nothing to lose but their water buffaloes, are joining forces against old warlords, spreading violence throughout Discworld's ancient cities. All that stands in the way of total destruction are 3 decidedly non-heroic creatures: Rincewind, the world's dumbest wizard; Cohen the Barbarian, who stands 5 feet tall in his surgical sandals; and a very special butterfly.

Discworld goes to war, with armies of sardines, warriors, fishermen, squid and at least one very camp follower. As two armies march, Commander Vimes of Ankh-Morpork City Watch faces unpleasant foes who are out to get him...and that's just the people on his side. The enemy might be even worse.

After their legendary adventures in the northern wastes and beyond, Fafhrd, the giant barbarian warrior, and the Gray Mouser, master thief, novice wizard and expert swordsman, are back home in Lankhmar again, and looking for an easy time. But Lankhmar is under attack from a strange horde of invaders, including a two-headed dragon and an army of miniature wanderers ...Once those threats are seen off, a quest to the farthest reaches of Nehwon is in prospect. And then, in the last book of their adventures, Fafhrd goes sailing through the clouds, and the Mouser takes to the seas, before we finally bid a fond, if sad, farewell to Lankhmar.

THE SECOND BOOK OF LANKHMAR includes the last three volumes of the hugely enjoyable series.

In The Light Fantastic, only one individual can save the world from a disastrous collision. Unfortunately, the hero happens to be the singularly inept wizard Rincewind, who was last seen falling off the edge of the world.

Old Man's War author John Scalzi's sendup of the heroic fantasy genre was a finalist for the Hugo Award for Best Short Story.

This was Tor.com's April Fool's Day Joke in 2011. The title was chosen based on the statistically-most-used words in Fantasy novels. Fun Fact: Scalzi's agent actually received a call from someone in Hollywood, wanting to buy the option on this "novel" for a movie.

Read the full story for free at Tor.com.

Watch Hugo-nominated Fan Writer "Mark Reads" Oshiro's hilarious video reading of this story here. (PG for profanity)